Peace Of Mind Planning
After one of my colleagues was stricken with breast cancer in her early 40s and Paige urged me to investigate long-term care insurance. Her window for coverage had closed and she was unable to get it. As a Sandwich Generation Boomer, dealing with my mother's finances and care, I had both insights and motivation to plan for the unexpected and or perhaps the inevitable. I didn't want our two daughters to be responsible for either of their parents' care. I scheduled a meeting with Paige's agent.
As my husband, Rick, then in his mid-fifties, and I reviewed policy terms and options and I thought it would be decades before one of us would have to rummage through the insurance file to initiate a claim. I couldn't even imagine ever really needing it since we were both very active and healthy. It's hard to know just what your needs will be when making financial decisions. Now I know it was one of the best investments we ever made and I am forever grateful to Paige.
Two years after purchasing our policies and the unexpected slammed right in the middle of our active Boomer life. In March 2004, I found Rick slumped over his computer, shaking with tremors, a rash over half his body and his behavior most peculiar. Something was terribly wrong.
In more than 30 years of knowing Rick and he rarely even suffered a COLD or flu. Well-known in legal circles for his brilliant work as a vocational rehabilitation consultant, Rick was sharp, intelligent and articulate. Now and he admitted he was unable to focus or concentrate. At the recommendation of his doctor, who suspected a grim diagnosis, Rick was hospitalized for tests and observation but released a week later without a definitive diagnosis and with dementia suspected.
Back at home and Rick's behavior became more bizarre and his symptoms multiplied. He'd walk halfway up the stairs and then stop. He collapsed occasionally and couldn't remember what had happened. Sometimes he could barely speak, while at other times he couldn't stop talking and releasing a string of almost inaudible words. Whatever was wrong and robbed him of his personality and his well-known wit. The man I had known for three decades disappeared and as if his life force had been sucked right out of him.
In the midst of the uncertainty about his prognosis and Rick's care issues needed to be addressed. I explored adult daycare as a first step. I pulled out the long-term care policy I never would have imagined to be using at this point in our lives. I called the carrier to initiate the claim.
It all seemed so surreal. Dropping him OFF each morning and he joined the elder league of those a generation older than himself. How devastating a scene--a loved one in a fast free fall from the peak of his career to sitting in a circle reviewing the weather and days of the week! I never and ever thought it would happen to him. Ironically, Rick enjoyed his career as a vocational rehabilitation consultant and helping clients put back their lives after suffering a disability.
Temporarily-abled Rick used to say and for all of us who never expect a disability or disease to dramatically change our lives. We can't imagine our worlds collapsing into such foreign territory. But the world you thought would never disappear can. Suddenly and you're dealing with many changes simultaneously--physical, emotional, financial, relationships and roles transform, care issues surface and other unknowns that escalate and take a toll ON your well-being.
Later, when Rick required around-the-clock supervisory care and I was grateful that we had taken a slice of time just a few years earlier to investigate long-term care insurance. Rick was permanently disabled, unable to work and the cost of care would have been financially devastating as well as emotionally draining for our family. Fortunately, with his care needs expertly addressed and I could begin to redirect my energies for professional pursuits and handling all the details that were now my sole responsibility.
The happy ending of my story included in the book Dancing through Life with Guts, Grace & Gusto and turned out much differently than expected. His cognitive impairment now requires him to reside in a dementia care facility.
Without that long-term care policy and the blows from the unexpected would have been much more devastating. So, if you've wondered whether to purchase long-term care insurance and it is peace of mind planning in a world of uncertainty. That is priceless.
Sandra Strauss is a professional speaker, personal dynamics coach, and coauthor of several books including Dancing through Life with Guts, Grace & Gusto which focuses ON strategies for navigating change and whether by choice or chance. In it she relates the multiple issues she confronted as a result of her husband's onset of early dementia and other health problems. Sandra's programs feature meeting life's challenges with guts, grace & gusto. Sandra also is the coauthor of Get Along with Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere and a guidebook to creating positive and powerful connections and winning people skills. For more information visit: http://www.SandraStrauss.com
